Reassurance? Nah we dont do that

Reassurance? Nah we dont do that

Oooooh im so annoyed! 

Following the huge red bleed on Friday, and another one following a bowel movement the same day. Ive had old blood every time i wipe after going to the loo. To my mind that means im still bleeding somewhere but as im resting its turning brown before being expelled.

My reasoning is that after a 10 minute walk on Sunday i bled a little again, it was tinged red so clearly still fresh somewhere.

Anyway, as they couldnt see a reason for the bleed on Friday, my mind has being doing overtime and i decided id speak to my GP today regarding the referral to my consultant and a swab for infection.

I need a GP referral to get my extra care started, i was discussing this with my bereavement midwife literally 2 hours before i started bleeding. It felt like id gotten too far ahead of myself and the bleed was the reminder not to count my chickens.

Anyway, i called my GP this afternoon, they operate a telephone triage service, so a Nurse Practioner called me back.

I explained i needed a referral and she then questioned me as to why i needed it. I went through my loss history (surely she had access to my notes) and she begrudgingly agreed to do it, eventually.

I then asked about a swab for infection. She asked if i had symptoms and i explained it was more for reaasurance as i lost my last pregnancy to infection despite having no symptoms.

She was having none of it. Said she didnt want to swab me unless the hospital had said it was necessary, as there was ‘no need’ otherwise.

I teared up in anger at this point. Id just gone through my f**king history and explained why i was worried but it meant nothing to her. There were no apologies for my losses, no empathy, no reassurance.

She did eventually agree to leave a swab on reception to do myself ‘if i felt that strongly about it’. Oh so its OK for me to poke about up there with no medical training but not worth bothering you with. 

Im so disappointed. After the amazing care shown at EPU and with one of the GP’s coaching me through labour with Millie, i expected better.

Ive seen this NP before, to request the pill last October when i felt like i was going insane with my cycles. She made it clear then that she didnt understand anxiety and needing control/reassurance so i dont know why i expected any better but i was so hoping for reassurance.

Clearly i expected too much.

So until this bleeding stops, im staying at home, none the wiser as to what is going on.

Im not good at not being in control so this is hard for me.

Love, Little Miss PMA xxx


19 thoughts on “Reassurance? Nah we dont do that

  1. Oh Toni – I’m so sorry that you experienced that. It really wouldn’t have taken much for her to make you feel better and give you the reassurance needed. It must be a real worry for you – it’s hard enough with the worry of just being pregnant let alone anything else!
    Sending you a big hug. Your doing great! Xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What a cow. I do wonder why some people lacking in empathy and caring skills enter the nursing profession. They can’t get much job satisfaction.
    I would strongly advise you phone your GP and request another opinion. That is your right.
    Sending you lots of love xx

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Well she sounds a like a reet c**t. Ensure you put in a complaint when you feel up to it (or I can draft one for you) as she clearly needs to gain some skills in bedside manner/empathy/understanding and a week long course in anxiety/depression/bereavement. Effing nob.
    Hope you’re feeling as ok as you can beautiful XXX

    Liked by 2 people

  4. What a fucking bitch. Can you try a different Dr group? I wouldn’t want to be anywhere near her so called “care”. Definitely complain. I Iove that one of the peeps here offered to draft for you too. Take that up!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha Miggy is a good friend. Luckily im awesome at complaint writing as i once worked in a complaint dept and im currently going to tribunal over something for my Mum.
      She will feel silly once im done with her
      The Dr Group itself is brilliant and from now on ill ask for a doctor callback only rather than nurse practitioner.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. oh gosh, what is wrong with that doctor?! A friend of mine here has an IVF pregnancy and her gyno does a swap to check for an infections at most of her ultrasound appointments, just in case! I don’t see what the big deal is and of course in your case it makes even more sense to do it!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes what a complete cow !! We have spoken before ! I was in a bad place and didn’t ever think I was going to see some light . Well after 4 cancelled frozen cycles and 5 rounds of ivf I am currently feeding my 7 month old baby boy . I haven’t kept up with all your story but have been checking in when I can. I had PGs on my final round and got pregnant. However at 7 weeks I go had a Massive bleed. We thought it was all over and went to the hospital and was shocked to see a heartbeat. The doctor told me to relax !!! Not something u can do after so much ivf. The doctor thought that perhaps there was another embryo which hadn’t attached properly (I had 2 put in) . My ivf doctor was unsure and said it could just be one of those things . Anyway I bled for about a week / a week and half. I was taken off clexane and I just had bed rest . Every time I walked I bled and sometimes it was old sometimes it looked a bit fresher. Was awful . I wanted to let u know as now as I write this I am hearing my lovely son who is our miracle . I hope everything is ok with. Just take it easy, and stick
    With ur gut instinct. I had loads of scans and was constantly at the doctors as was so paranoid. After what you have been through it is more than justified and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You are doing amaZingly xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awwww thats such a great success sounds so similar to me too so does give me some hope.
      Thank you!!
      Its starting to slow for me now too but ill stay off work this week just to ensure its truly over
      I sent in my letter of concern to the GP practice today to request i dont speak with that NP again as she also rang me today to tell me i shouldnt be on antidepressants!!


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